Carrying My Heart Around

December 11, 2012

You know that saying “Having children is like having your heart carried around outside of your body”?  That is how I felt processing these.  It is 1:00 AM and I couldn’t quit until I finished because I was just completely mesmerized by the gift of this perfect little girl.    All these expressions I want to remember.   I can’t say how much I enjoyed just sitting her looking at her.  I got teary eyed when I just saw so much of her shot after shot and realized what a gift pictures are to a mama’s heart.  I feel like I have won the lottery when I get captures of my children that I know will speak to me forever.

I get so busy during the fall that it is hard to stop and photography my own babies.  Today I decided that I would take some pictures around the house.  My intent was black and white portraiture.  As usual, I LOVE black and white, until I see it in color and then I tend to gravitate towards the color.   I got some cuties of the baby too.  Saving those for another day.

Such a girl.  She’s hot then she’s cold…she’s yes than she’s no…:)

I see this little look all the time.  Treasure.

Here is the top shot in black and white, which was my original vision for it.

Many years ago, in a talk with God, I placed a request for a baby girl that would look like my mom.  I have this picture in my head of my mom at this age.  She had dark dark curly hair and big brown eyes , this little nose and an olive complexion.    My mom’s eyes got greener as she got older (like mine are doing) but when she was young they were darker.  So often I look at my daughter in wonder because God really did answer my prayers.  I see so much of my mom in Tori and several pictures in this series I especially see it.  My mother sees it too.

By the way, this is “Kristi Simpson” hair.  :)   Tori and I decided to try plunking Tori’s hair (remember that old post?).  We didn’t have the patience to dry it all the way under the blower dryer (because that process was on the tedious side with the diffuser and turning it off and on) so we let it air dry.  Worked quite nicely she and I thought.

I have learned that it is best to not “direct” Tori.  I let her make posing decisions (or not) and then I try to quickly capture what she decides to give.  She has a pretty short attention span for four so we have to collaborate our agendas (if I want to remain sane).

She just might be the most beautiful little girl I have ever laid eyes on.  Yep.  For sure.  She definitely is.  Beauty is so much more than the frosting and she is the full package.

Uh oh.  Fading….

Tonight we sat and watched the Michael Buble Holiday Special (I love that guy).  Tori snuggled into my lap as usual.  I can’t not sing so I sang along as I held my baby girl.  I saw her close her eyes with a big contented smile on her face.  Next thing I know, I had sung her all the way to sleep.  She dreamed on through most of the show until I carried her to bed.  I hope when I see these pictures years from now, that I will still remember that moment from today.  Such a simple thing but a moment that I treasured in my heart because I know I won’t get many more of those opportunities to rock my girl child and sing her to sleep.

Did I mention she missed her nap?

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3 Responses to “Carrying My Heart Around”

  1. Aunt Beck says:

    HOW HAPPY I AM THAT I WAS UP LATE!!!!! Oh my goodness (I first wrote goodness and had to back space. As I did the thought occurred to me that goodness does indeed from God and He is the giver or great things!!!)

    I see my sweet sister’s face in your little angel as well. I love how God answered your hearts desires and more! She looks a lot like you too! (And has your ATTITUDE, tee! hee!) Thank you for this sweet good night! I hope I dream of all the goodness God has given me <3

  2. Ann says:

    I agree – Tori is one of the most beautiful little girls I have ever laid eyes on. What is refreshing is that I know with you and Jim as her parents, she’ll be taught that there is more to beauty than what is on the outside and I suspect she has and will always possess an inner beauty that matches her outer beauty. I love all the pictures of your kids, thanks so much for sharing them with us! (and I need to schedule a photo shoot with you for my kids sometime in the Spring — I’ll be in touch).

    Merry Christmas Doni!

  3. Kristi Simpson says:

    As I was looking at these pictures of Tori I was wondering if you used a curling iron on her for the shoot. Beautiful hair…more beautiful girl!

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